A friend was recently asked this on her grad school application. It made me ask myself: Why do I blog? I've been writing for 20 years and only shared a handful of those pieces with a handful of people. What on earth possessed me to want to suddenly share my thoughts with the world (or at least the dozen or so that would actually read it given the oceans of blogs out there)?
These types of subjective questions usually take me awhile to articulate. I am an intuitive feeling kind of person. I can tell you that I loved a book, but if you ask me for the themes in said book, it's going to take me awhile (or I'll just say, "I don't know. It was a good book!" and wonder why your questioning me like my high school English teacher). Abstract just is not my thing.
I expected my answer to the question of blogging to be along the same lines: "I don't know. I just do." Yet, surprisingly, that was not the answer that popped into my head. I didn't even really have to think about. It was just there.
I blog because I know what it's like to believe you are alone.
In January of 2009, my stepmom, or Mum as I called her, was diagnosed with stage 4 pancreatic cancer. She did well on chemo for quite awhile, but in June of 2010 the treatments stopped working. My parent was dying.
She was 65 years old. So young. I was 36 years old. I didn't know anyone else who had lost a parent at that age; who had needed to support their own children in their grief over losing a beloved grandmother, while caring for their dying parent and their surviving parent. I had bought into the lie that no one understood. That I was alone.
Of course, I knew God was with me. Prayer and verses like these helped me to survive most days:
"God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble." Psalm 46:1
"Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest." Psalm 11:28
But I also needed to know that another human being understood where I was, who had didn't have to explain it to, who had walked through it and could tell me, from experience, that it gets easier, if not better, eventually.
And into that place, God sent two precious sisters. Two dear friends who had been there, survived it and understood where I was.
As I look back over my life, I can see so many places where God has given me this support, this community. And I can see places when I have been able to be there for someone else who believed in their darkest, most painful place that they, too, were alone.
And through it all, this much is clear: God created us to live in community. And sometimes that community is virtual :)
"Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their work: If one falls down, his friend can help him up. But pity the man who falls and has no one to help him up! Also, if two lie down together, they will keep warm. But how can one keep warm alone? Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken."
Ecc. 4: 9-12
So this is why I blog:
I don't have all the answers or all the experiences. But I can say to the mom of a child with special needs, to a child of parents with disabilities, to an adult struggling with the loss of their parent, to a reserve military spouse who feels isolated in their civilian world, to a woman who is trying to hold everything together in spite of her own hidden disabilities: "I understand and you are not alone."
And sometimes, that's all we need.
